I have mad skillz
Well, I have just blown my brains out in our annual halo 2 party. It is 11:30, my eyes are glazed and I am suffering from abdominal pain. This party was our biggest yet, with around 23 people. It was fun, in the weird nerdy sort of way. I'm just glad no major fights broke out. Oh boy, I can't wait till next year!
posted by stephen @ 11:21 PM
23 Comments:
Hello Stephen,
I came across your blog and I liked the pics posted. My name is Trupti and I'm from India.
Happy Holidays! :-)
Ciao,
Trupti
Wow, looks like I really missed out...
stefunk,
Greetings. I am Rufus. I like the pictures on your site, although I have a big problem with your blog in general. You use far too many compound verbs and prepositions, and I have to admit that it confuses me to the point that I can't figure out what on earth you are talking about in your posts. I am not a native English speaker, although I consider myself pretty good (I worked with many Americans and Canadians in the 1970s). But even with my english skills, your posts are quite incomprehensible. Please redo your entire blog. Thank you.
Greetings Rufus,
You are a crackhead.
Thanks.
It was alot of fun. I can't believe that it went so smoothly. Now I wish that we would have played a game with just us two against everybody.
Also your skillz may be "mad," but my skillz are downright angry.
Your skills may be angry, but mine are crazy good. There is a difference.
Stefunk,
In response to your inappropriate comment, I'll quote a Lithuanian Proverb. It translates: "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth." So there.
But I thought you eat horses in Lithuania. Or maybe you eat everything except the mouth. What do you do with the hooves? They would make nice feet for a table. Do you use every part of the horse, like the Eskimos?
stefunk,
You show a complete lack of understanding. Period. I'm going to insult you now in my native Russian tongue.
Я не могу полагать, что ваша жизнь является настолько хромой, что Вы имеете время, чтобы перевести русского на английский язык только, потому что кто - то делает комментарий относительно вашего бессмысленного blog. Вы пахнете подобно корме.
Rufus, as I am not from Lithuania I do not understand your insult. Earlier you left a comment challenging my grammar. I know you are from a different country, so learning the correct usage of english can be a pain and time-consuming. So I will point out some minor discrepancies in your blog.
1. You incorrectly spell laboratory. I don't know if this is the way you spell it in your hometown and you sometimes switch back to your native tongue, but this is incorrect in the english form. I don't how a learned man like you could incorrectly spell a simple word like laboratory. A music major who goes to school in Texas might, but not you.
2. As you probably already know, Lithuania declared independence from the fomer Soviet Union (although it was not oficially recognized by Moscow until 1991 following the abortive coup in Moscow) on March 11 1990.
It was integrated into NATO and EU in the spring of 2005. Therefore, Lithuania would still have been a part of the Soviet Union in 1987 when you began experimenting on yourself. Why would you be exiled to your home country? Why were you exiled? Was it because of the uprising?
3. Did having a third arm enhance your pirate experience? Or did this happen before your ill-fated experiment?
4. Dr. Zhivago is spelled with a Z. Or you might be reffering to the new rock sensation from Vienna, Dr. Shivago. Anyway, I am a fan of the movie myself. I loved Omar Sharif in The Ten Commandments.
5. Do you listen to Barry Manilow while doing your experiments?
6. In your newest post, A New Hobby, you say you have been studying the stars for two hours and the time was 8pm. However, at the bottom of the post it says this was posted by Rufus the Great at 9:43am. How do you explain this strange occurrence?
Thank you for your time, Rufus. It is exhilarating to talk to someone of such great intellectual stature. I wonder, do you play piano?
Minor mistake: Lithuania was integrated into NATO and EU in the spring of 2004. By the way, Rufus, what is your political stance?
Hey steve, I translated Rufus for you. His last comment said, "I cannot believe, that your life is so lame, that you have time to translate Russian to English language only because who - that does(makes) the comment concerning your senseless blog. You smell similarly to a forage"
Thats what the translator spits out so it doesn't make total sense.
stefunk,
Well, I don’t normally spend time answering long lists of questions, but for some reason I feel that my integrity is at stake. So I’ll indulge you this time.
1. Forgive my misspellings. I work with many toxic chemicals and stay away for up to 220 hours straight in my lab at times, so occasionally between the drugs and the sleepiness I may slip up. But as you said, a man of my genius would not normally make a mistake like that.
2. I’m afraid that you misread my post about Lithuania. I was not talking about it’s independence from Russia. Rather, as I said in my post, Lithuania was annexed into the Soviet Union in 1940. The holiday I described is in celebration of Lithuania’s victory over the Prussians. Big difference between Russia and Prussia. Feel free to look that one up.
As for my being exiled, I was not exiled to my home country. I am originally from Uzbekistan, but Lithuania is where the Soviets often sent people when they didn’t want them anymore. My third arm was the reason for being exiled. It was an embarrassment to the Soviets.
3. The third arm was the result of the ill-fated experiment, so I was not privileged to have it while working as a pirate.
4. My apologies about the movie. I have the Lithuanian version, and I translated the title as best I could. My mistake.
5. I listen to Barry Manilow constantly. I have all his albums, and a few other ones by Lithuanian bands doing Barry Manilow covers.
6. The time change occurrence is because blogspot.com is on Pacific Standard Time. The difference between PST and Lithuanian Time is 10 hours. So for instance, when I post this comment, it will say I posted it at about 9:00 pm, but in Lithuania, it’s actually 7:00 am. Make sense now?
7. It’s funny that you bring up the piano. It’s quite an interesting story. Before being a pirate or chemical engineer, I was a pianist. I was actually very good, so good that the Soviets sponsored a world-wide tour for me when I was 18. Tragically, however, it ended when I walked out on stage at the first concert of the tour. I tripped over my shoelace, fell off the stage and broke my ankle when I landed wrong, trying to catch my footing. At first the doctors said I would be back on my feet in a few weeks, but after the bone would not heal correctly, the doctors had to amputate the foot. It was my right foot, and as you may know, pianists need this foot for the pedals. So I had to give it up for good. After the surgery, the doctors had planned to put a prosthetic foot on the end of my leg, but these were hard times for the Soviets, and all they could find was a short, stubby stick that stuck out of my leg so that I could walk (with a limp, of course). About a year later, someone on the street saw me with my peg leg (or peg foot, really) and said, “Hey Pirate!” Of course I replied that I was not actually a pirate, but later that day it occurred to me that I would probably make a pretty good pirate. And the rest is history.
I hope this answers your questions, stefunk. I appreciate your inquisition, but next time, please do your homework first.
Oh, I forgot to answer your question about my political stance. I am a member of the Party of Life's Logic, founded in 1996. But I thought that you would have known that. It's 7:15, and the day is just starting for me. I have some great projects today. Maybe I'll tell you about them later. Did you know that you can remove someone's fingernails with zinc dust? They will tell you aaaaaanything after that first one goes.
Rufus you seem to be a very serious person; however, two can play at the translation game.
Вы очень умны, хотя ваш мозг возможно поврежден из-за ваших экспериментов.
Centurion,
I'm thrilled to see that a fellow blogger speaks my native tongue. And yes, I must admit that you're right. Being in the laboratory for hours, day, and years on end will do things to you - both physically and mentally. However, I can assure you that it is a rewarding profession.
I'm in need of a westerner like yourself who understands the Canadians (they‘ve become a personal favorite of mine), and speaks Russian too. Lithuanian is really just a dialect of Russian, so you would learn quickly. The fact that you're a centurion would help too. Something about a centurion makes people very afraid. We could even do a whole Roman theme in my laboratory. Let me know if you're interested. We could make beautiful torture together.
Rufus I see you are very interested in РУССКАЯ ФАНТАСТИКА (RUSSIAN FANTASY). What is your favorite story?
POST SOMETHING ELSE!
oregonhotsauce,
I don't see why I would need a Russian Dictionary. I'm very proficient in the language. If anything, my Galician needs some work. I could also stand to brush up on my Ancient Egyptian.
Centurion,
Моим любимейшим русским сказом быть "сестрой Alyonushka и братом Ivanushka." Я сказан что по мере того как молодой мальчик я спросил бы, что моя мать сказала мне этот рассказ каждая ноча перед идти к сну.
Rufus
Is it like the story of Hansel and Gretal?
I'm sorry but I'm not familiar with this tale.
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